Monday, October 3, 2016

It's all in my head

Image result for queen caricature crown emoji


Ø  When I become president Port Harcourt will have a minister of appropriate attire. Stiff penalties for dressing your body like it belongs to someone you'd never met and were misled regarding their proportions and complexion, etc.

 

Ø  When I become president places of worship will have their public address systems turned inwards own their own internal public and churches too stingy to pay proper organists who don't make their audience tone deaf will be banned from having anything louder than their palms to make music with.

 

Ø  When I become president places of worship will be treated like markets: situated in one long stretch of shops or buildings. Mosques, churches, shrines etc. all mixed up. Let's see y'all bomb one another or try to coexist without some sort of truce. 😏

 

Ø  When I become president: phrases like 'only in Naija', 'the good old days' etc will be heavily frowned upon and those who utter them, fined and given large dog tags to wear with the inscription 'oh drat, I was an ass'😒


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